I received a copy of How To Raise An Adult for review. All opinions are my own. See my disclosure for more information.
There’s a large age gap between my children. I have a 19 year old son, who will be married in October. Gulp!
I also have an 8 year old son and a 3 year old girl. Naturally, we’re doing things differently with our younger two than our eldest. As you go and grow as a parent you learn, you adapt, you make changes as you need to. And that’s a good thing. One change I’m happy to be seeing, in general, in the parenting community, is an exodus from “helicopter parenting.”
Don’t get me wrong. I’m a huge proponent of attachment parenting. I think babies should be with with their parents as much as possible. I believe it creates a spirit of security in them. I believe in co-sleeping, baby wearing and extended nursing. But somewhere along the line, as our children mature. It’s imperative for them to be able to make their own decisions. They need to learn to trust their own abilities, and experience failure – all in the safe and loving environment of parental care.
Why is this so important? Because if our kids can’t learn to think critically, make good decisions and trust their abilities, we end up with adults without a compass. And we’re seeing that now aren’t we? A whole generation of young adults without plans, or they have dreams with no idea what steps to take to achieve their dreams.
I’m so glad How To Raise An Adult is leading the charge to help parents raise children into self-sufficient adults.
About How To Raise An Adult
Author Julie Lythcott-Haims reflects on her experience as a mother and interactions with other parents, educators and college employees as she explains the intricacies of how helicopter parenting causes our children more harm than good. And, how it leads to stress for parents as well as society in general. She offers readers good tips and strategies on how to allow our children to make their own mistakes, develop true self esteem, and determination. All of which works together to raise a child into a resilient adult.
About the Author
Julie Lythcott-Haims has an impressive list of accomplishments, Including graduating Stanford and Harvard Law, sitting as Dean then Assistant President at Stanford, and receiving the Lloyd W. Dinkelspiel Award. However, her greatest accomplishments in my eyes are her self-sufficient teens. She’s lived the journey that lead to the wisdom she shares.
My Favorite Points
I loved Haims’ section on Hard Work At Home Leads To Promotions in The Workplace. Here, she makes the point that if teens want to be treated like adults, they need to act like adults. If a child can learn to be helpful, diligent and self-motivated at home, that behavior will easily carry over into the workplace.
And my heart really resonated with the chapter on why we should Give Them Unstructured Time. This is the heartbeat of many homeschools, mine included. Parents, our children need unstructured time! Time to discover what they like, what they don’t and what they do well. They need time to imagine and run and develop their imagination.
Imagination leads to innovation! I love how Haims encourages us to create a “playborhood.” This concept was based on a book by Mike Lanza in which the neighborhood is viewed as a small world where children can play and develop as individuals.
Disclaimer: She’s not saying let your kids roam in an unsafe, unattended way. Just to let them explore beyond the confines of the four walls of their home in (again) a safe environment. You can be with them, just don’t hover and pounce at every issue.
How To Raise an Adult is a good read for parents of children of any age. It’s given me new ideas to try with my little ones, as well as things to try to help my eldest be the best grown up he can be. If you’d like a chance to win a copy, enter below.
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